7 Meaningful Compliments That Have Nothing To Do With How You Look
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Lindsay Holmes
Deputy Healthy Living Editor, The Huffington Post
“You’re a great listener.”
In a society full of distractions, being an intent listener is actually a cherished quality. When you tell someone that they’re a good listener, you’re showing them that you appreciate their presence and their thoughtfulness in your conversations. Being an active listener can also boost your relationships, so by thanking someone for lending their ear, you’re also solidifying the friendship.
“You’re a really strong person.”
Resilience is an important key to happiness — and remarking on someone’s strength shows that you’re noticing how emotionally agile they actually are. As well-being expert Brad Waters, LCSW, points out in a Psychology Today blog, that ability to bounce back is one of the greatest human traits. “[R]esilient people are like bamboo in a hurricane — they bend rather than break,” he wrote. “Or, even if they feel like they’re broken for a time, there’s still a part of them deep inside that knows they won’t be broken forever.”
“Your work on that project was incredible.”
There’s nothing more gratifying than hearing that your work — something that you painstakingly put passion and effort into — was valued and appreciated. Research shows that productivity increases when we’re happy at our jobs, and there’s no better (or easier) way to spread cheer throughout the office than by sharing a genuine compliment about the quality of someone’s work.
“You inspire me.”
Hearing that you’re someone’s role model is an instant mood booster — but having admirable people and leaders in your life can also be good for business. As Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, explains, being an inspiring influence can do wonders for our work. “When employees have ethical leaders, they like them better,” she wrote in a Psychology Today blog. “Just as importantly, they will behave in more positive ways within the organization. Clearly, it’s to everyone’s advantage to have supervisors who are positive role models.”
“You’re a wonderful mother.”
Or brother, sister, father, aunt or grandfather. How many times have you been unsure if you’re doing what’s best for your family? As The Orange Rhino, a HuffPost Parents blogger, confesses, all parents just want to be good enough for their kids: “I want to be a mom who doesn’t feel inadequate. Who doesn’t look at her friends (and strangers) and say: Wow, they are great moms, why aren’t I like them? But instead looks at them and says: Wow, they are great moms and so am I. I am a good mom.” Hearing from a third party that you’re doing something right when it comes to nurturing your child or other relationships is reassuring — and probably one of the best compliments you can give.
“You are an amazing friend.”
We may be hardwired for friendship, but that doesn’t always mean we’re the best at it. Research shows there are multiple benefits to creating strong social relationships. By telling someone they’re a good friend, you’re also telling them that they mean something to you. And who doesn’t like to feel accepted?
“You have a beautiful heart.”
Anyone can compliment a pretty face, but as the old adage goes, it’s what’s on the inside that counts. If you want to truly touch someone, compliment their personality, humor, heart or spirit. That’s who they are at their core — and that’s way better than hearing that you’re wearing a nice skirt.
7 Meaningful Compliments That Have Nothing To Do With How You Look http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2016/01/22/genuine-compliments_n_5617439.html
