2013年2月23日PCE Club 和廖冰博士创建的英华双语学校联合举办了观看和讨论纪录片“Race To Nowhere"的活动。我觉得很有必要把PCE 三年前的活动总结和讨论拿出来、分享给更多的家长,希望引发大家更深层次的思考 -- 教育的本质到底是什么?
About the Film
"Race to Nowhere" is a film that calls us to challenge current thinking about how we prepare our children for success. Named by TakePart.com as one of “10 Education Documentaries You Don’t Want to Miss”, “Race to Nowhere” brings communities together to spark dialogue and galvanize change in America ’s schools.
Short Synopsis
A concerned mother turned filmmaker aims her camera at the culture of hollow achievement and pressure to perform that has invaded America ’s schools. It is destroying our children’s love of learning and feeding an epidemic of unprepared, disengaged, and unhealthy students. This remarkable new film shines a light on the price our kids pay for this “race to nowhere.” Cheating is commonplace, stress-related illness, depression and burnout are rampant, and ironically, young people arrive at college and the workplace unprepared and uninspired.
Featuring the heartbreaking stories of young people who have been pushed to the brink and educators who are burned out and worried that studentsaren’t developing the skills needed for the global economy, race to nowherepoints to the silent epidemic running rampant in our schools.
以下是PCE 志愿者及活动组织者Bonnie Zhang and Cindy Zhang 写得活动总结:
英华老师和父母子女教育俱乐部成员:
谢谢你们能抽出时间参加2月23日的“竞争无道”影观与讨论。 下面是有关这次活动的侨胞消息报道和讨论总结。希望大家有时间可以在网上继续讨论你们的想法和感受。
侨报消息
(Bonnie Zhang)
2013月23日星期六晚, 在新州普林斯顿的英华国际学校,父母子女教育俱乐部和英华共同举办了俱乐部第一百一十一期活动,播放了教育纪录片竟争无道(Race to Nowhere),并由教育专家廖冰博士主持观后讨论。竟争无道被TakePart.com评为十部不可错过的教育纪录片之一,它向人们展示了目前美国教育体系给孩子们带来的学习压力以及其带来的身体和精神上的伤害, 例如厌食,失眠,忧郁, 自杀等等。观后,讨论以分组形式开始,大家积极参与,涌跃分享。不少家长观后被片中由于美国教育体系的缺陷所造成的一个个真实的悲剧所触动, 感到心碎,但又觉得这些悲剧有些极端,并怀疑它们是否有代表性。廖冰博士以她多年的教育经验,结合自己过去十八年和儿女一路成长的历程,分享了亲身经历的一个个故事,让大家意识到,片中的悲剧并非偶然,这些悲剧经常发生在我们的身边,但却常常被人们忽视或被人们掩饰。廖冰博士认为子女教育的核心是帮助子女找到一个他们既热爱又能持久的追求。另外,要引导子女注意学习方法,要引导他们学会如何面对失败并从失败中走出来。最后,廖冰博士再次强调和谐的亲子关系是子女教育成功的关键一环。
“竞争无道”影观与讨论总结
(Cindy Zhang)
首先,我们十分感谢廖冰(Bonnie Liao) 能有机会组织英华老师及父母子女教育俱乐部成员一起讨论目前多数父母,特别是亚裔父母所具有的共同问题,那就是在孩子面临越来越大的压力和竞争时,如何帮助他们减轻压力,顺利度过他们的学生生活,并能在毕业后能够有一个正常满意的工作和生活。
在这次研讨会上,廖冰分享了她自己两个孩子的的亲身经历, 并通过她在Lawrenceville school 教学的经验,及她多年学习研究孩子情商教育的丰富知识,引导大家调整心态,改变和提高自身的认识,从而从根本上培养和教育好孩子,使他们能够在将来拥有真正意义上的持久人生幸福。
以下是大家所提出的问题以及讨论内容的简要总结。
目前学生面临的问题:
· 美国目前的教育:自从2002年美国提出“No child behind” 的教育方针以来,以及随之而来的以分数衡量教师和学校以后,学校的教学只是为了对付标准考题,并没有给教师足够的空间去自由发挥他们的教法,也没有给学生足够的时间去认真思考所学内容的道理。
· 学校教学质量和学生学习方法:由于教师待遇不好,教师的教学质量得不到保障。教师的教法有问题,特别是数学教师,概念不清。有些课目的老师布置的作业只是为了应付差事,作业本身没有多少学习价值,给学生增加了时间负担。学生每天都在匆忙地应付当天应完成的作业。常常形成“知其然而不知其所以然”的局面。 由于睡眠不足,学生的身体健康受到影响,注意力不能集中,学习质量下降。
· 高中阶段的竞争:现在申请大学的竞争越来越激烈,大学对录取学生的要求越来越高。 为了能够进入好大学,很多家庭包括孩子自己不得不选修多门AP课,同时还要搞好体育运动,音乐艺术训练,参加社会服务及义务劳动等等,比中国的学生还要累。孩子被折腾得筋疲力尽,已无心思考学习方法,消化学习内容,只是为了临时考试过关,积累GPA. 考完全忘记。 到了大学里,中学所学的AP课多数都要重新学。
· 选择大学的压力:父母和孩子在选择学校时,一味强调进常春藤学校。最后因学不上去,只得改变专业,学习自己并不喜欢的专业,甚至不得不换学校,让孩子多走弯路。
· 当今学生所承受的心理压力和对未来的悲观情绪:孩子承受的压力不是每个家长都能看得到的, 即使是和家长有很好沟通的孩子,有时也不会向父母诉说一切。孩子的压力可以来自学校的老师,家里的父母,也会来自同学之间。学校里激烈的竞争和父母繁忙的工作,使孩子们看不到未来生活美好的一面,只有无休止的工作和竞争,产生悲观情绪。
要想改变以上状况,父母要做到教育有方,竞争有道
· 明确培养和教育孩子的立足点和层次:美国40年追踪研究结果表明,和成功最相关因素不是智商,而是持续性(persistent) ,激情 (passion),责任 (responsibility), 自制力(discipline),勇气 (courage) 与合作精神 (cooperation)。所以,父母教育孩子的第一步应该是从培养孩子的个性和能力开始,即教育出一个具有高情商的孩子。
· 几点建议:
o 父母要能够和孩子一起面对竞争压力,不乱方寸,按照每个孩子的特性,扎扎实实地实行每一个阶段孩子应该受到的教育和培养。不要过分担心孩子的学习分数。因为我们培养孩子的目标不是只停留在能否去常春藤学校,而是他(她)们一生的工作能力和生活质量。既可谓磨刀不误砍柴工。
o 注意与孩子交流时要避免鼓励“聪明”,而是要注重“努力(effort)”,以及上面所提到的各个方面。
o 多给与孩子锻炼情商的机会,如“英华在北京夏令营”活动,和童子军(Boy Scout /Girl scout) 训练
o 培养孩子对新鲜事物的兴趣,变悲观为乐观。悲与乐只是一念之差,但这一念的转变,从人间地狱到人间天堂,需要家长和孩子很多的投入
o 对比较小的孩子,父母要敢于放手,给孩子空间,培养他们的责任心,并让他们有独立思考的机会,从小培养他们自己发现错误并解决问题的能力。
o 对于初中高中生,要引导孩子提高学习效率,注意学习方法,放慢节奏,多去理解所学内容。父母尽量不要额外再给孩子增加负担注意学习方法。对于一些没有意义的作业,适当调整,减少作业,保证睡眠时间。
· 廖冰及父母子女教育俱乐部在这里向大家推荐几本父母教育方法的好书:
§ “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success” by Carol Dweck
§ "Boys adrift" and "Why gender matters" by Dr. Leonard Sax
§ “Active Parenting Today” and “Active Parenting of Teens” by Michael Popkin
§ “How to talk so kids/teens will listen & listen so kids / teens will talk” by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
§ “Teaching you children Well - parenting for authentic success” by Madeline Levine
§ “Building resilience in children and teens” by Kenneth Ginsburg.
希望通过这次活动的交流,使大家能够看清楚培养孩子程序上的主次高低,避免本末倒置。 如果孩子有了责任心,自制力,对所学或所做的事情有极大的兴趣和热情,能够持之以恒,那么,学习方法和知识的积累将自然会水到渠成, 即所谓“纲举目张”。如果我们的孩子在经过不断地训炼与调整后,能有较强的韧性去承受压力,用良好的心态去面对生活,乐观的眼光去向往未来,以至于达到“无为而无不为”(老子道德经)的境界,则能充分享受人间幸福,实现完美人生,笑到最后。那么我们做父母的也就可以说是的做到了教育有方,竞争有道。
PCE 家长观后感:
徐蕾:Last night's event is one of most memorial events for me since I joined in club 3 years ago. It might be the biggest topic PCE even touched. it is an issue beyond the control of parents, teachers, schools but ironically parents, teachers and schools all attributed to the problem somehow.
From surface it seems just an issue of unhealthy competition hurting kids' health or even taking away their young lives, I even argued that cases from the movie might be isolated or extreme until I heard the discussion led by Bonnie's. (See, I would miss the whole point without Bonnie pointing out the essential of the problem.) I realize that the prevailing problem and disappointing fact is aimless race causes kids to lose motivation to learn, lose capability to think and lose encouragement to question. Modern society turns the education system into a massive production line so that standardization, measurement and cost efficiency are applied to these products--our kids. Certification, score, ivy league schools are used to label and filter these products--our kids. Multiple purpose, all climate function are desired and expected by customers from these products-- our kids. But, our kids are not product, they are human beings. They can be 大器晚成. They can have break down. They should allowed to be not 多才多艺。At the end, not only the tragedy family, but also the society will bear the cost. But how to stop this? How to turn this around? What can we do? What can I do? I felt pretty powerless.
The thing touched me most was Bonnie's candid sharing of her daughter's painful experience. My eyes got wet when I heard "I want to do so and I didn't because I know how much you love me and how much I love you". What a wonderful young soul that wanted to end up her life due to none-selfish reason and decided not to do so due to none-selfish reason. How hard for a mom to share it in public. How much harder for a successful educator to reveal her scar under countless admirer's eyes. At that moment, I felt there is hope. The hope comes from the others rather than from myself. I felt we are so lucky to have educators like Bonnie to share and analyze the bloody reality with us, to shed the light on the alternative choice. I felt we are so lucky to have PCE with us to support each other when we wade through the storm.
黄敏:Thanks Lei so much for your touching sharing and initiating the discussion on this very important topic!
I had the exactly the same feeling about this event -- I have to say that 2/23rd event was one of the most engaging, active, touching and learning experience that I have had in PCE events as this topic is so close to home.
I was very encouraging to see more than 120 people(including children) came, especially seeing many fathers and teenagers. Many people actively and openly shared their views about the film "Race to Nowhere" , education, find the right college for youchild, how to help children to learn how to handle the failture, the importance of children's health, and many more. I learned so much from Bonnie's sharing. Like most of parents, I also have the fear of "If I don't push harder--what if my son will fail at school--what if he goes to very normal college--then cannot find good job--then he cannot have a good life,--I will regret for rest of my life for not have been pushing him harder".
After I heard Bonnie's talk, I felt like the tremendous burden was lifted and was replaced with a great sense of relief. To be exact -- I was LIBERATED. Thank you SO MUCH Bonnie for your parenting story. You talk the talk and walk the walk, have the confidence and wisdom to support your daughter and son's decision of picking the 'fit' college. When I have time, I will share more on this topic later.
璐蓓: Although I did not have the chance to watch the movie, I went through an introduction on youtube. As a parent of college students, I indirectly went through the pressure of my kids in high school.
Starting from their 2nd and 3rd year of high school, they had to take all the exams, SAT, SAT subjects, AP exams etc in addition to their busy school work, sport activities, academic competitions, etc. Adding in the college application process, deciding where to apply, drafting essays, figuring out deadlines, scheduling interviews, and visiting were extremely stressful. The pimples and acnes on their faces reflected the stress level, which faded after college application.
Now they are in colleges and seem no break either. Exams, projects, social life, research, etc keep them from sleeping. They also have to look for internship! Parents with medical school students must know that stress level. There is endless stress from young age to our age.
We may not be able to change the fast pace society (maybe the movie has some impact.), however we can control a micro-environment -- that is our home. Our love to kids, understanding to their ability, expectation from them contribute most to their success. Success doesn't mean getting into to an Ivy school. For me, it means to raise a kid with mental and physical health that can take challenges in the life long journey.
My kids consider we did a good parenting job after reading Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.They did not have much so called "teenage rebel" . They are more appreciative after leaving home, and always eager to come home whenever there is a school break. We keep good communications for what they do in college. I feel very fortunate.
Now I wish them graduate on time, healthy, and be able to make living after that. My colleague has a son who still can not graduate after 7 years.
Philip Qin: Dear folks, first best wishes to everyone for the new year, sincere thanks to the club and event organizers for the great efforts, then to share my little bit of thought on human education and self development, can’t write too much here, but am willing to share more in the discussion after the film on this Saturday.
Ever since human started building civilization, knowledge needs to be passed along to the next generations, this is called education, mostly to the youngsters. Self development is a different but broader concept, it applies to all ages. There have been big and long lasting confusion about education and self development, especially in the ways to carry out them correctly, for thousands of years in almost all nations and countries, till now.
There are 3 levels for human education and self development: knowledge, understanding, and intelligence.
1. Knowledge is to know how things are and what happen.
2. Understanding is to know why things exist and happen in the ways they do, with the help of knowledge learned;
3. Intelligence is to reason and analyze the internal and in-depth links between things to figure out the patterns or rules to predict future more accurately, with the help of the knowledge and understanding acquired and accumulated.
So you see these 3 are different, the right ways to achieve them are also quite different.
Learning knowledge is the basic layer usually takes most of the time of education. There is a very big misconception about this layer, the most common concept is to make the students learn and remember more or all knowledge in the teaching materials, then test their memory of such knowledge as a main part of the exams. But people overlooked one fact is that based on the structure of human brain, memory do fade away over time, this is why adults forget about many detailed knowledge learned in the schools after years, thus setting the goal for the students to memorize all the knowledge does not make good sense since they will forget a lot later anyway. Expecting and requiring students to memorize all knowledge sets tremendous unnecessary load and pressure on them, causes most of the problems in educations, like the one in this film.
Ideally understanding the knowledge should be set as the primary goal of education, but the fact is the weight on this is too light. Intelligence is more difficult to teach, especially when the teachers and parents don’t really understand how it is formed and developed.
Knowledge can be looked up easily when needed with materials so well prepared and accessible now, more weight should be put on the understanding and intelligence build up. But sadly the fact is opposite. More knowledge should be presented to the students, but shouldn’t be required to be memorized, with enough interest and exposure, key knowledge will be remembered naturally with no pain and pressure. Promoting understanding and intelligence needs some new and better ways after knowing more about how human brain develops and works, with tremendous improvements due.
With in-depth and thorough understanding about the whole spectrum of knowledge, understanding and intelligence build up, a break-through and revolution can be achieved to realize much more or most of human potential, lift to tens or even hundreds of times higher in natural and no pain ways, as I believe, to happen. Thanks.
黄敏:
Dear Phillip and parents
What an enlightening and insightful writing!
I have never thought the way you systematically categorize the human education and self-development into 3 levels:knowledge, understand and intelligence.
But if I may, I would like to add 4th level - Spirituality
I am so glad you brought up how human education develops through the perspective of how human brain works.
For most of us who have high education, we put a lot emphasis on children’s education, we sacrifice so much for our children and hoping we are preparing our children for the best of their future, BUT WAIT, which level of education we are focusing on? Are we mindlessly running on the treadmill – working hard and merely just achieving the level 1 – knowledge or inspiring our children to aim the highest level -- intelligence? It is the tough question we would need to ask ourselves.
I always admire independent thinkers, who don't follow the crowd, who form their views through great deal ofcuriosity, a great deal of researching, great deal of thinking, great deal of experimenting, who have the intelligence (I am also using your modelJ ) to think outside of box, who have the confidence and wisdom to be authentic oneself.
I often to tell my son that “Independent thinking is very important. I am more interested in your thought process than just the correct answer. Many people would give a correct answer without putting much of independent thinking, they might either copy from somewhere or heard from somewhere, and not mention that lot of things in this world have no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ answer. You have the full freedom to find your answer with zest, no matter what that answer is, it is YOUR answer.”
Last week, I was reading book "Einstein: His Life and Universe " by Water Isaacson, I was absolutely fascinated by his personal story, his genius intellect and characteristic of his independent thinking.
Angela Chiu: THANK YOU, Philip and Min for your wonderful sharing! I would like to share the following 11-talk series on schooling, creativity, and critical thinking.
Re-imagining school (11 talks)
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